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Monday, August 17, 2015

Swimming is Overrated

Maybe it's because I grew up in Arizona where backyard pools are a dime a dozen. Or perhaps it has to do with a scary early childhood event when some older boys held me underwater, but swimming is overrated as far as I'm concerned.

I just don't enjoy it. Mind you, I CAN swim and I can even swim with my face in, but I don't like any of it. I think part if my dislike of swimming is that it's such a hassle.

My cute new swimsuit I got before
our vacation to Hawaii that I 
never even wore.
First, you have to change clothes. And not just change clothes, but change into a swimsuit. Ew. And really, my dislike of changing into a swimsuit doesn't even have to do with how I feel about my weight or appearance in general. It's just such a pain. And swimsuits make me feel self-conscious because so much of me is exposed. Double ew.

Then there's the issue of a towel. If I remember one, it's great, but that's only about half the time. So then I have to sit and drip-dry. Or try to get that wet swimsuit off, but then, where's the towel again? Oh, yeah. At home where I left it.  We won't even talk about if you have to go to the bathroom when you're still in your wet suit. Getting that thing back on is about as easy as putting panty hose on an elephant. No, thanks. I'm not into that.

And if getting into the swimsuit isn't enough hassle, there's the hair business. Wet hair is sort of okay. But the look after it dries makes me a little crazy. My hair is short, so it doesn't look all that bad. But it feels different, not like it should. Too flat, too straight. Too chlorine-y. All that can be avoided by not going swimming.

Don't even get me started on the use of sunscreen. It's a must, I know. And I use it because I'd be stupid not to in the Arizona sun. But again, I'm not into inconvenience. Or sticky, shiny stuff all over my white, exposed body. And someone has to apply it to my back and I'd rather not have people touching me that much. Only my husband can cross that line and I barely even like that. But thank you, Honey, for keeping my back from burning. I really do appreciate it. 

I think I've made my point. I don't like swimming, or even swimsuit-ing. But here's the clencher. I love the beach. So next time you take a beach vacation and see a middle-aged lady on the beach in her capris and tank top, wave. I promise to wave back.


1 comment:

  1. Linda, you went to Hawaii and you DIDN'T GO SWIMMING??!! I think Rollin should take ME next time! I swam in the pool this morning, after my walk. I love to read in the shade while in a wet bathing suit--Arizona in all its perfection. If I think I might go swimming, I wait to take my shower and wash my hair until afterward. So, how about some morning you come over and bring that cute orange swim suit? I'll even have a towel for you.